Grief and Loss in Middle Grade: An Interview with Lisa Stringfellow

I’m grateful to School Library Journal for always giving me so many opportunities to dig deep into topics that interest me and interview so many wonderful authors. I wrote the cover story for SLJ’s October issue, “Good Grief: Middle Grade Authors Normalize Loss.”
SLJ and all the authors I interviewed were kind enough to allow me to share these interviews in whole here on TLT, which is so exciting to me because everyone had such great things to say and I could only share small snippets of these conversations. This article features interviews with K. A. Reynolds, Jess Redman, Gary D. Schmidt, Emily Barth Isler, Debbie Fong, Lisa Stringfellow, and Christina Li.
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Please enjoy this interview with Lisa Stringfellow. Be sure to check out the article in SLJ and come back to TLT for the rest of the interviews in the upcoming days.

MacGregor: What inspired or influenced the idea to center grief and loss in your story (or stories)?
Stringfellow: As a teacher, I’ve had students who have suffered the loss of a parent. In A Comb of Wishes, I wanted to write a story that affirmed those experiences and showed a child who struggles but is surrounded by caring adults who support her. Grief is a human emotion that we all experience. Books can be a safe way for children to see and process those feelings.
MacGregor: What are some things your character does to cope with their loss or how are some ways the grief presents itself? How are the grieving characters supported?
Stringfellow: Kela tries to act “normal” to keep her father from worrying but she struggles with her sadness and withdraws from others. She describes it in the book as “balancing on a tightrope.” In crafting Kela’s character, I started with research into ways that kids express grief and how adults can respond. I talked with a friend who is a social worker to get feedback on Kela’s behaviors and feelings. The adults in Kela’s life support her by keeping the lines of communication open and giving her time and space.
MacGregor: A hallmark of middle grade books is offering hope to both the characters and the readers. Was this particularly challenging for you to do while tackling grief/loss?
Stringfellow: One of the unexpected challenges came through how magic is used in A Comb of Wishes. An earlier version of the novel ended with a “happily ever after” in which Kela’s mother death never occurs, but it was unsatisfying because that’s not the way death works in our real lives. We can’t just wish it away. I eventually found an ending that doesn’t erase the reality of Kela’s loss but instead offers reassurance that she’ll still be okay.
MacGregor: Why is it important to address tough topics like death in middle grade? (I’m thinking of all those who say things like, “Why write sad or hard books when life is hard enough?” or those who would like to “protect” children from these storylines, as though they don’t happen all the time to real actual children.)
Stringfellow: Sometimes adults hesitate to give kids books that deal with “heavy” topics. I try to convey to the parents of my students the importance of kids reading all types of books, including the sad ones. Reading a book that deals with a subject with which they can relate helps a child not feel alone. It is exactly how we can help them think about and process their own feelings and build empathy towards others.
MacGregor: What do you hope readers take away from your book?
Stringfellow: Sometimes adults shy away from discussing tough topics with children, but those conversations are necessary. Grief is a human emotion that we all experience. I hope adults use A Comb of Wishes to foster healthy conversations about death and loss and remind children that the ones who have left us will stay in our hearts.
Filed under: Guest Post

About Amanda MacGregor
Amanda MacGregor works in an elementary library, loves dogs, and can be found on Twitter @CiteSomething.
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