The Music that Heals Us, a guest post by Jennie Wexler
Boxes of vinyl records sat untouched in my parents’ storage room, begging to take their rightful place on a decades-old turntable covered in a thin layer of dust. During my last visit, I asked my father if I could take a couple of albums, hoping to display my favorites on shelves in my own home. I thumbed through a box, my eyes landing on instantly recognizable artwork. All four Beatles dressed in colorful costumes behind a large bass drum bearing the words, Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Heart Club Band. Licensed to Ill’s rear end of a jet plane crash daring us to take a ride with the Beastie Boys. Jimi Hendrix, Mitch Mitchel, and Noel Redding on the other end of a fish-eye lens asking us, Are You Experienced? Tommy. Led Zeppelin IV. Dark Side of the Moon.
I wanted them all.
It wasn’t right – iconic masterpieces lying dormant in a cold storage room. Music that was meant to be consumed as a story. Not a single track, but a cohesive album of notes and chords that all belonged together, that built upon one another. As my fingers ran along the edges of each album, long-forgotten memories bubbled to the surface of my mind.
“Who is this?” my father asked, his green eyes flicking to me in the rearview mirror, as the opening notes of Strawberry Fields Forever poured out of the speakers and filled our 1984 Toyota. When I was a little girl, my father turned long car rides into musical quizzes, knowledge that would imprint on my developing brain and stay with me throughout adulthood.
“The Beatles,” my tiny five-year-old voice proclaimed, pride swelling in my chest. I didn’t know a lot, but I knew music and more importantly, I felt a sense of awe as I listened. My father ensured I was immersed in the sounds of the sixties and seventies, the pure rock that came out of those decades. He owned guitars and amps, picks lying haphazardly around our house, ready to be put to use whenever the mood struck. He strummed while I sang Can’t Find My Way Home, one of our favorite songs, the memory still vivid today, a blanket wrapped tightly around my shoulders. Whenever I hear that Blind Faith tune, it feels like home, safe, a hug from my father. When you share an intense love for a song with someone, it’s an unspoken bond, a knowing of what speaks to both of your hearts.
When I entered high school, music became more than a cool riff or relatable lyrics. It was a lifeline. Two months into my freshman year, a car accident claimed the life of my friend at just fifteen years old. Everything I understood to be true was shattered in one phone call and I struggled to understand the concept of gone. My grief was unshakeable, heavy, and relentless. I don’t know if it was my father’s intention to ease my pain or just a way for him to connect to his shell of a daughter, but one day he brought home a CD for me – Help! by The Beatles. We owned it on vinyl, but he knew I only consumed music on my CD player, and he wanted me to have my own copy. The next week he came home with Revolver. The week after that was Rubber Soul. A new Beatles CD appeared every week until I had a complete collection. Every week I climbed an inch further out of my grief, the music breathing life back into my colorless world.
I began writing WHERE IT ALL LANDS as a way to process the grief from my teenage years that still grabbed hold of me unexpectedly, even as I became an adult and started my own family. I wanted to write the story I needed in high school – a story that could help a teen cope with an upheaval in their lives. Losing a young peer is not only devastating, it’s shocking. For years I’ve unsuccessfully attempted to untangle my complicated feelings about loss. Writing WHERE IT ALL LANDS was another attempt, another way to try to heal. All three main characters share an intense love of music and they depend on their favorite songs to guide them through difficult times. For me, like the characters in WHERE IT ALL LANDS, music is the one constant throughout my life that has comforted me and helped me find meaning in the face of tragedy.
Today, music still guides me. My father’s vinyl records are displayed in my office, the same songs, like dependable old friends, continuing to inspire me after so many years. Every song tells a story, and every piece of music is a time machine – a way to remind me of a forgotten moment or a hug from my father just when I need one. But music isn’t my only salve. Writing, reading, and art are the tools that help me chip away at life’s unanswered questions. Just like me, I hope teens today can pick up a book, stare at a piece of art, or listen to their favorite songs when they need to make sense of their complicated worlds.
Meet the author
Jennie Wexler spent the first part of her career producing and writing scripts for television shows appearing on VH1, Bravo, and The Travel Channel. Jennie’s debut novel, WHERE IT ALL LANDS, will be released from Wednesday Books on July 6th, 2021. She is an SCBWI member and lives in New Jersey with her husband, son, and Havanese puppy. You can follow her on twitter @jenwex or on IG @jenniewexler.
About Where It All Lands
A Sliding Doors-esque novel that reveals how our choices define us and how no matter the road, love can find its way.
Stevie Rosenstein has never made a true friend. Never fallen in love. Moved from city to city by her father’s unrelenting job, it’s too hard to care for someone. Trust in anything. The pain of leaving always hurts too much. But she’ll soon learn to trust, to love.
Drew and Shane have been best friends through everything. The painful death of Shane’s dad. The bitter separation of Drew’s parents. Through sleepaway camps and family heartache, basketball games and immeasurable loss, they’ve always been there for each other.
When Stevie meets Drew and Shane, life should go on as normal.
But a simple coin toss alters the course of their year in profound and unexpected ways.
Told in dual timelines, debut author Jennie Wexler’s Where It All Lands delivers a heartbreaking and hopeful novel about missed opportunities, second chances, and all the paths that lead us to where we are.
Publisher: St. Martin’s Publishing Group
Publication date: 07/06/2021
Age Range: 12 – 18 Years
Filed under: Uncategorized
About Amanda MacGregor
Amanda MacGregor works in an elementary library, loves dogs, and can be found on Twitter @CiteSomething.
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